Quoting anonymous sources are customary in journalism. They are also useful when there is no source at all. Particularly in Pakistan, a journalist (or churnalist) can give vent to their anger against anyone by using phrases like ‘on condition of anonymity’ and ‘declined to be named’ with impunity.
But what happens when tables are turned? What happens when some anonymous person starts taking on a particular but powerful community of journos? Well, the answer is the mayhem created after Saroor Ijaz has emerged on Twitter.
The same people who did not mind the anonymity of the Major are now compelling Saroor to come out of the closet. The anonymous blogger complains, too: “No one has a convincing answer why anonymity was perfectly fine for MajorlyProfound and not justified for Saroor Ijaz.”
It suggests anonymity is not a matter of rantings as long as it is in your favour.
The fact that his appearance on Twitter almost coincides with the disappearance of MajorlyProfound has made some people conjecture if he is the same blogger. But it is pure guesswork.
The anonymously famous Saroor Ijaz has won more than 1500 followers in just 50-odd days, thanks to his “waspish asperity” and “brutal wit”, as he himself puts it. The likes of Sherry Rehman, Sharmila Faruqi, Wajih Sani, Fawad Chaudhry, Bilal Lakhani, Maria Memon, Muneeb Faruq, etc., are among his followers (not necessarily fans, mind you.)
You may like him—or her? Or even they?—or not, but he is going to be one of the biggest things of the Pakistani Twittersphere.
Saroor introduces himself on Twitter as “Controversialist Satirist Sarcastic liberal promiscuous. Attended posh Phillips Exeter Academy, USA and Melbourne Law School.”
His extraordinary wit—which is sometimes offensive or even vulgar—and his exceptional command over English language are two of the reasons why his influence is spreading like a wildfire on the social media. And with the introduction of his Facebook page and blog, he is suggesting he is here to stay.
But despite his vulgarity, the liberals cannot term him ‘beygairat’ as it would be equal to owning him; it would be equal to accepting him as a member, if not the leader, of the ‘Beygairat Brigade’. “The irony is unmistakeable.”
Saroor briefly uploaded his picture a week ago on his Twitter account, but removed it saying his fans wanted him to remain anonymous.
Saroor Ijaz’s idiosyncratic way of giving names to the powerful members of Twitterati is another reason of liberals’ hatred to him. Interestingly, his own name is derived from Saroop Ijaz, a columnist of The Express Tribune.
Below is the list of a few variants:
Mehreen ZaharaAlood Malik from Mehreen Zahra-Malik
Alas Nasir from Abbas Nasir
Afeem Farooq Paratha from Nadeem Farooq Paracha
Kamran Shafi Sharma from Kamran Shafi
Marvi Indra Sirmed Gandhi from Marvi Sirmed
Raza Romanvi from Raza Rumi
Aunty Tummy Hulk from Ayesha Tammy Haq
Omar Oreo Cookie from Omar Quraishi
Bilal McDonalds from Bilal Lakhani
OTHER SIDE OF COIN
For Saroor Ijaz fans, all is not well in the phenomenon. They should be condemned for following him so religiously. Why?
Humans have an instinct that they tend to focus on things that are in their interest and pay less or no attention to those that might turn against them. That is why when Saroor Ijaz will change his skin, the people considering him as their leader will be gutted. So if you think he is on Twitter for you, you are in for a very rude awakening. Saroor Ijaz is nobody’s friend.
But how one can be so sure Saroor Ijaz ‘will’ change his line. Let’s read his tweet that seems to be ignored by his fans, especially right-wingers, in amazement:
“Next month when Saroor Ijaz takes on the right-wingers on Twitter, the same libidos will start hailing him as their long lost cousin.”
So follow Saroor Ijaz if you have courage to laugh on a joke that is intended to insult you.